King of the Hill

[Shine 144]

So, this game is called King of the Hill and it is very simple to understand.

There is this hill, and one person is king of it at all times. The next poster will make up a way to work him off the hill and take over.

A couple of rules must be there

• You CANNOT kill a player.
• You CANNOT have defenses such as uber force shields and similar things.
• You CAN have other forms of defences such as barricades or similar things, but these must be penetratable.
• The more brutal, the more fun.

BANG!!!!

Shine creates the Hill.

Shine is now king of the hill.

[sessanta 4]

i pick shine up and throw her off the hill then i build my self a wall with a peephole in it

[Shine 144]

I grab a pencil and poke it through the peephole into your eye. Sessanta is startled and flees off the hill in half blind terror. I now climb your wall with climbing gear I bought, and once again conquer the hill

MY HILL

[Storm 426]

I charge in on my Whooly White Rhino mount and knock the wall down, sending Shine tumbling down the hill.

I do a dance since I am now king of the hill.

Edited July 9, 2013 by Storm

[Brown 14]

I put on my robe and wizard hat and Storm flees in disgust.

And then I stand on top of the hill like a rhino. Rhino's don't play games. Rhino's f***in' charge your ass.

Edited July 9, 2013 by Brown

[Storm 426]

Once I am a safe distance from Brown's dreadfully tacky transmog outfit, I punt a gnome directly into the back of his head. he is unphased, but angy. He charges the gnome but misses and runs all the way off the hill. I climb back to the top of the hill with a sack full of gnomes to throw at the next contender

Edited July 9, 2013 by Storm

[Felbrew28 1]

First I corrupt Velen with the a fragment of the skull of Gul'dan that's in a ring presented to him as a gift for his 25,0XX birthday. Then I summon Archimonde and Kil'jaeden from the grave and fuse the three into some sort of super mega evil draenei warlock.

[Storm 426]

You never said how this super mega evil draenei warlock is going to knock me off the mountain, so I'm still king of the hill. My epic legs suffered some durability loss when I soiled them at the sight of your summoning, but regardless I am holding my ground and throwing gnomes at you while taunting you through /emote.

[Vladamyr 169]

I eat the super mega evil draenei warlock for breakfast (because that's what mages do) which in turn causes Storm to lose control of his bladder again. Suffering from dehydration, Storm tumbles down the hill in his weakened, dizzy and frightened state. I then blink to the top of the hill, set all the gnomes on fire,cackle maniacally and put down my ring of frost. Now I'm king.

[sessanta 4]

i fly over your ring of frost with my dragon and bomb you off the hill and claim the hill for myself

[Shine 144]

I walk up the hill so slowly that the ring of frost has actually expired, whilst farting in the general direction of Sessanta and his/her dragon. Upon smelling the reek from it they start running in the other direction, luckily I charge around the hill on my super awsome Acherus Deathcharger, and intercept them on the bottom, now I chase them back up the hill with my severe ugliness after which I fumble them in not-so-decent places so they tumbe towards the BLizzard office to file a complaint about the gamemechanics nowadays. I now /train on top of the hill so all the land will hear my super awsome horn.

GET OFF MY HILL

(*Waving an old wooden cane in the air*)

Edited July 23, 2013 by Shine

[Storm 426]

I find a temporary fix for my dehydration by downing a dozen Thunderbrew's Hard Ale.

Sessanta's GM ticket gets answered, and Shine receives a 3 hours ban.

I crawl up the hill and proceed to pass out at the top.

[Demyndra 6]

I plant a barrel full of sleeping powder infused pretzels to lure Storm down in their drunken state. Upon consumption Storm is passed out at the bottom of the hill.

I climb to the top and erect a set of Titanium loud speakers which blast a continuous loop of Rebecca Black's "Friday." Scaring all attackers away.

I AM KING OF THE HILL!

"It's FRIDAY! FRIDAY!"

[Shine 144]

Equipped with my new [earplugs] headpiece. I continue to not give any crap about scary music since I am unable to hear it. (This is also very usefull to block out Storm's snoring)

I now continue to tickle demynra so he/she flees from me. What she did not know is that I had covered my hands in Itching powder (The pretzels gave me the idea) so once down the hill, Demyndra starts itching on all the places where I tickled (And I'm a spicy tickler). This results in me /lauging loudenough for me to not hear, Demyndra Rolling over the ground and trying to wash away with water, Storm still snoozing somewhere down there, and me gaining a brand new set of Titanium loud speakers.

Having these speakers I pull the Lamb of God CD I brought and pump the song Redneck for all the land to hear. I also put up a screen to show all the world the awsome videoclip that goes right along with it.

KING ME!

Edited July 23, 2013 by Shine

[Vladamyr 169]

The GM receives an anonymous complaint (LOL it was me) about Shine's inappropriate touching and he receives a strong written warning and a 6 hour ban this time. I mosey on back to the top of the hill, finish listening to the Lamb of God CD (it's good) and then throw in a little Unearth.

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Sessanta's dragon think's that I rock so hard that it switches allegiance to me and guard's my hill against those who would rock less.

The crown looks good on me!

[Storm 426]

I'm awoken from my drunken slumber by the Lamb of God, or maybe I'm just sleep walking, nobody knows for sure. I summon an Army of the Dead and we rush to the top of the hill in a giant wall of death. The mosh pit that ensues is legendary. There's thrashing, and head banging, and elbows flying. At one point the dragon rises up on two feet and spreads his wings to perform a monstrous air guitar solo while breathing fire into the air.

In a moment of pure rockstar glory Vlad jumps on top of the crowd to crowd surf, and my skeletons carry him all the way to the bottom of the hill.

I continue to rock out like any true king of the hill would.

Edited July 23, 2013 by Storm

[Vladamyr 169]

cast Alter Time. In a moment of pure rockstar glory Vlad.... polymorphs Storm into a sheep. The dragon finishes his guitar solo and looks hungrily at Sheep Storm. Sheep Storm flees the hill crying "baaaahhhh". The Army of the Dead crash to the ground, inanimate once again after their 40 seconds of epic partying. The land rejoices at having such a majestic King!

[Demyndra 6]

I am finally relieved of my scratching fervor and I call the aide of my shaman friend, Shammwoww. I ride to the top of the hill on my Astral Cloud Serpent (yes I actually have one!) while the shaman sneaks to the top of the hill. Completely distracted my awesome, amazing, awe inducing mount, Vladamyr doesn't see the Shaman sneaking up the hill. Vladamyr can only scream as he is thrown off the hill by the shaman's Thunderstorm spell, landing at the bottom, just barely alive from the massive fall. The dragon has since been gone, preparing a worldwide tour for his new heavy metal band, Iron Dragon. I pay the shaman for his services and he leaves on his way. The gateway despawns, I summon my Succubus, and I am King of the Hill!

[sessanta 4]

i find a potion that allows me to turn Demyndra in a child but let him stay on the hill because he looked so cute

[Shine 144]

I am starting to get overwhelmed by some true metal the way it's supposed to hurt. Therefore I cannot conquer you all alone. I am forced to give a call to my good friend Peter Dinklage and we come up with a plan.

Petey shows his face somewhere down that hill and everyone still concious enough to play the game of hills runs toward him screaming for an autograph. Ofcoarce everyone knows him being Tyrion 'the Imp' Lannister and his awsomeness is quite overwhelming.

Whilst everyone (Including sessanta) is super distracted I sneak up the hill to down a bottle of jaeger.

You sure look tiny down there.

[Nemo 27]

Exhausted from all the metal awsomeness Shine had sneakily conquered the hill. But little did he know that all was not as it seemed.

In a moment of pure genius I, the Phantom Menance, struck from the shadows to switch out Shine's bottle of deliciously chilled Jaegermeister with one I had deviously preheated over the fires of Ragnaros defeated.

Overwhelmed by the sheer horror that is boiled Jaeger, Shine fell to the ground in disgust.

It was then that I revealed my true self; with a bellow worthy of the whole crew of Slipknot rolled into one, I strode bodly to the top of the hill (where, unfortunately, a lot of unworthy men had gone before)...

Kicking the choking Shine of my hill, I hit the strings of my Martin D-28. "They said I weren't forgotten", I said. "Well, I wasn't dead either!"

Edit: The King is back, baby.

Edited July 24, 2013 by Nemo

[Storm 426]

Little does Nemo know he is playing Johnny Cash's personal Martin D-28. After my polymorph wears off I cast raise dead on the guitar and Johnny Cash himself arises and shoots a man named Nemo just to watch him die.

I stay at the bottom of the hill. I don't dare mess with undead Johnny Cash. He is now the king of the hill as he wears his crown of thorns, upon his liars chair.

(On a side note, Nemo doesn't actually die, because that would be against the rules)

Edited July 24, 2013 by Storm

[Vladamyr 169]

Turning to survey his hill, Nemo Undead Johnny Cash notices a beautiful shiny portal. Unable to curb his curiosity, Nemo Johnny touches the portal and finds himself in Stonard. I then stride up the hill, robes billowing, to take my rightful place. Even honey badgers flee from my path as I ascend. Upon reaching the pinnacle, I summon my bottle of Kettle One and settle down for my long reign as KING.

[Shine 144]

being curious about this kettle one thing Vladamyr is drinking, I quickly ninja my way up the hill. I now interrupt Vlad's drinking channel and kick his arse black and blue. Damn, the bottle didnt drop. well at least I have the hill.

[Vladamyr 169]

I "LOL" as Shine gives it his all to smack down one of my mirror images. Shine looks pale but I offer him a cup of my fine Vodka. Peter Dinklage has made his way back to the top of the hill. I summon a table and chairs, offer Peter a cup, queue up some Machinehead over the titanium speakers and we all sit down to drink together. I ask Peter and Shine how they had gone about building up their immunities to Iocane powder? Peter and I laugh heartily and he invites me to guest star on his tv series. Shine looks very ill and pale. I pour us all another round.